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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/24275473">All Tied Up and Nowhere to Go</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account'>orphan_account</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Doctor Who (2005), Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Crack, Humour, M/M</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-05-19</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-05-19</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-03 00:34:43</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Mature</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>586</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/24275473</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Barty and the Doctor are in a bit of a predicament.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Tenth Doctor/Barty Crouch Jr</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>17</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>All Tied Up and Nowhere to Go</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><ul class="associations">


        <li>
            A translation of

            <a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/8356612">Никак не развязаться и некуда деваться</a> by <a href="https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kollega/pseuds/Kollega">Kollega</a>.
        </li>

    </ul><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>Yes, I am the original author of this crazy fic. I'd forgotten all about this fic until I came across a Russian translation of it. Thank you to Kollega for their Russian translation.</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>"This is all your fault," Barty grumbled, glaring at the Doctor. Both of them were chained to a wall with their arms wrapped around each other's waists, and tied tightly with their chests pressed together in a dingy dungeon that was hardly bigger than the two of them.</p><p>"What did I do?" the Doctor asked. "If I could just reach my sonic, we'll be out of here in a jiffy... Oooh, that's a good word."</p><p>"You were your usual Doctor-ish self. At least I know when to shut up."</p><p>"Barty, focus!" the Doctor moaned, as he wriggled around, trying to free himself, getting a strangled yelp in reply and he could hear the other man's breathing speed up. "Do you mind not panting in my ear? It's very distracting." </p><p>"Can you not... squirm like that?"</p><p>"Hmm?" the Doctor asked, suddenly becoming aware of the effect his movements were having on his doppelganger. "Barty, see if you can use your mouth."</p><p>"Excuse me?"</p><p>The Doctor made an exasperated noise. "To get my sonic screwdriver from my left pocket. Honestly, you humans and your over-active sex drives."</p><p>"What?"</p><p>"Rapid increase of pheromones, heavy breathing, that poking into my hip..."</p><p>"I'm only human. I'm still mad at you, you know," Barty answered, trying to slide down the Doctor's body.</p><p>"Why?"</p><p>"You left me in eighteenth century France," Barty complained from somewhere around the Doctor's chest area. </p><p>"It was an accident. Besides, when I came back, you had managed to get involved in a threesome with Casanova of all people."</p><p>"Mm, that was fun." More wriggling. </p><p>"I've just remembered, my sonic is near the bottom of that pocket and while your tongue may be dexterous, I know it's not long enough to reach it. Come back up." The Doctor felt, rather than heard, the rude noise Barty made against his chest. "Now, there's no need to be like that," he commented, trying hard to not let Barty know that he was feeling slightly aroused too, as he maneuvered his way back up. The Doctor could feel the heat of Barty's body against his chest, almost burning through his clothes.</p><p>"Any other bright ideas?"</p><p>"Can you tap into your magic?" the Doctor asked. "I mean, without using your wand."</p><p>"Only if I get highly emotional... Why?"</p><p>"Well, if you can generate enough magic so we can get out of here. This wall is really cold. The best way to go about it is to get you worked up enough that you will get us free enough so I can get my sonic out."</p><p>"Okay. And how are you going to do that?" Barty asked, then jumped as he felt something wet on the skin just behind his ear. "Did you just lick me?"</p><p>"Well, I was going to get you angry but then I thought you might end up forcing a regeneration, so this way is much better," the Doctor answered, his voice low and husky as his breath tickled Barty's ear. "You taste good. You had a shower today and you used the bar of 'Honey, I Washed The Kids' from Lush," he said, running his tongue along his companion's jawline, tasting and savouring, feeling him tremble against him. "Your body's so hot," he mumbled, before pressing his lips to Barty's mouth in a searing kiss, which Barty returned eagerly. Barty tasted of coffee and peppermint. The Doctor wished that his hands weren't tied so he could explore the other man's body and watch him slowly unravel under his ministrations.<br/>
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